Being a virgin has, over time, evolved to be a shameful thing rather than a good, modest thing, hence questions like “How to tell my boyfriend i’m a virgin.”
Your status as a virgin is your business, and you do not necessarily have to talk to anyone you do not want to about it. Whether you tell your boyfriend you are a virgin is entirely your decision and nobody else’s.
Revealing it in a casual chat or discussion on a first date will be different from letting it out when you both are in a committed relationship where intimacy is on the horizon.
How to tell my boyfriend i’m a virgin
Except you might have lied about it in the past, telling your boyfriend that you are a virgin should not make you feel like you are admitting something cynical about yourself. On the other hand, it should not be much of a big deal if you are stating it for their information.
You do not necessarily need to explain your reasons for still being a virgin. Sometimes people feel like this is a discussion they should have to get off their chest. They often tend to rush the whole thing and share this information in a manner that is not healthy for them or their boyfriend.
If he understands where you are coming from, he is more likely to respond in a way that makes the whole situation more comfortable and better for you.
If your partner appears uncomfortable talking to you about sexual-related topics, ensure that you are in a one-on-one conversation and have their absolute attention. You can tell him that you want to let him know something about yourself. It should just be a presentation of facts, but you should be honest about how you feel.
When you decide to tell him, you do not need to give your entire dating history or autobiography; you can keep it straightforward. To avoid making it look like you are expecting a particular reaction from your boyfriend, you can say, “I feel comfortable with telling you that I am a virgin because I feel like this relationship is headed towards us getting to be very intimate at some point.”
You can also say, “Is it alright with you that I am a virgin?” Some people become nicer when you tell them about your insecurities, but being a virgin is not enough for one to be insecure.
Should I Tell My Boyfriend That I Am A Virgin?
If you had said or done something that might have led your boyfriend to believe something opposite, telling them that you are a virgin might feel like a stressful period, but when you do, be completely honest with him. It is better than hiding the truth.
How best to tell your boyfriend that you are a virgin has a lot to do with your relationship, where it stands, and how you guys move on. Do not present virginity as morally superior or preferential because that would give a “holier-than-thou” impression about you. Please do not assume your boyfriend is a virgin unless they had already told you.
You can skip telling your boyfriend that you are a virgin if the idea of speaking about it makes you feel awkward. You can always talk whenever you are ready but do so after considering these points:
It is essential to share your sexual history with anyone you intend to get intimate with. Your boyfriend should likewise be honest about his past experiences. A discussion about STDs and protection measures should come after. You both need to have a clear understanding of yourselves in a relationship.
Some people may not be comfortable with the concept of “taking” someone’s virginity and should be made knowledgeable beforehand. Your first time might include some physical or emotional discomfort, and letting your boyfriend know beforehand might make them take things slowly on your behalf; if it ever gets to that point.
We usually make assumptions about communication in a relationship, but there is no particular approach. The best way to know if you and your boyfriend are on the same page is to be honest and open about beliefs and expectations. Be clear about what you want.
Can Your Boyfriend Tell If You Are Virgin Or Not?
Nobody can know if you are a virgin except you tell them. All your boyfriend might do is make assumptions based on your body language or lifestyle.
You might be nervous about telling your boyfriend that you are a virgin, probably because of your fear of being rejected by him, but that should not bother you. He will respect your boundaries if he loves you as much as you believe.
It is not bad if your boyfriend decides that not sleeping with you is okay for them. No matter how long you have been in a relationship, you should feel comfortable communicating what you are or are not pleased with.
Are You Comfortable With Your Virginity?
The concept of virginity has been pretty overblown in recent times. No matter what the reason you have not had sex or do not want to have sex might be, it can be helpful for you if you get comfortable with what your virginity means to you.
Before getting into a relationship, you should have been able to define what it means to you. Everyone else might view it differently as the notion is not as black and white as it is presented. With this understanding, you can figure out what it means to your boyfriend.
It is crucial to chat about your views, beliefs, and opinions on sex and its place in your relationship. This should not make you feel like you have to clarify the circumstances surrounding your virginity or justify your reason to remain a virgin.
If you have opted to delay or abstain from sex, you do not necessarily have to justify your decision to remain a virgin or explain yourself if you do not want to. Being a virgin is not weird or odd, so you do not have to explain it to anyone.
What To Do If Your Boyfriend Is Not Comfortable With You Still Being A Virgin?
We should not forget that everyone is entitled to their views or beliefs. Even when they affect us negatively, we should try to be understanding or tolerant because we might also have ideas that do not sit well with others.
One person’s reaction to a particular situation might differ from another person’s reaction, so you might be uncertain about how your boyfriend responds to you still being a virgin.
If your boyfriend is uncomfortable about you still being a virgin, you can try to figure out his reasons or reach a compromise. If, as time goes on, it seems like the relationship will not work out because of it, you can walk away from the relationship. This is not an entirely bad situation; it simply points out that you both are not a perfect match.
What To Answer When Your Boyfriend Asks You If You Are A Virgin?
Some people find it nosy or rude when asked questions about their sexual status. Not everyone is comfortable with discussing their sexual past. You should never forget that it is your body and your right to keep information about your sexual life to yourself or share it anytime you prefer.
There will come a time in your relationship, though, when your boyfriend will need to know if you have been sexually active or not. You are advised to reveal such information to only people you trust. Telling your boyfriend that you are a virgin shows honesty and trust. These are two pillars of a healthy relationship.
Be cautious about anyone who makes you feel guilty for being a virgin. It is not only unhealthy and manipulative, but it is also a big red flag. It would be best if you were not shy about being a virgin at whatever age.
Even in a relationship, some people still prefer to remain virgins until marriage, so definitely, a time will come in your relationship when you will have to talk about it. Your virginity is just one aspect of who you are. On the other hand, how he reacts to being a virgin will tell you everything you need to know about him.
If you choose to practice abstinence until you both get married, he has to respect that decision. If he feels uncomfortable with that decision, you must decide whether the relationship will be worth it.
Conclusion
Your virginity is your business. You do not have to tell the person you are dating that you are a virgin until you feel comfortable revealing such information. It would be best if you waited until you were ready, not because of your reputation or your boyfriend’s thoughts about you. Do not let your actions be a result of peer pressure.
The decision to tell your boyfriend is entirely yours and nobody else’s. You are responsible for mentioning your virginity to any prospective partners; this does not mean you should let it out to anyone on a first date.